Written on Monday, April 5, 2021. The day that I will officially be done serving on the Board of Directors at Vineyard Church, after over Thirty One years.
Friends,
This has been a difficult last few days.
I’ve been back and forth this weekend from questions and concern, to awesome hope for what God has ahead, both for Vineyard Church, and for whatever He leads us to do, to regret that I didn’t stand firm 5-10-15-20 years ago as I felt the church slipping into consumerism and “the show” and simply reaching but not transforming. God has done so many great things, but only because of His mercy. But, I can’t help thinking of the possibilities. I was not the watchman that I needed to be. I missed the signs.
I was too caught up in raising my own kids, seeking peace and happiness, and taking for granted the call to fight for this church to be the powerful force for transformation in lives. I have seen the enemy… and it is me – I cannot blame anyone for the state of the church – only me. Oh, God, have mercy. I am sorry, my friends, for being asleep and distracted. Our families have been impacted, Lives have been impacted. Family legacies have been impacted. People have died, families devastated, ruined, divorced, torn apart by sin and selfishness. On one hand, knowing that we have influenced a handful is great, but the pain of knowing the extent of the devastation is too heavy right now. Pray with me and for me.
In some ways, this weekend, I feel like Oskar Schindler at the end of Schindler’s List: WATCH THIS IN THE CONTEXT OF WHAT I SAID ABOVE
A 3 minute clip, but this says it for me and Vineyard Church:
When I talk about how God has brought tens of thousands of people to us at Vineyard Church, and we brought them in, sat them down, and gave them some truth, but then left them unconnected to a transformational community, THAT is why I say “I Could Have Got More….” Vineyard Church has over 80,000 names in their database of people who have at one point in time, connected enough to hand over their name. THAT is trust. Trust that we must treat as a sacred one. WE COULD HAVE GOT MORE….. This program – that could have bought us ten more lives… This expense…. that could have got us a dozen… This effort, that we were so excited about in the moment, because it would bring fame to us as a church, could have got us hundreds of transformed lives. I COULD HAVE GOT MORE! I am so sorry. I COULD HAVE GOT MORE.
I want to call you to pray. To pray for a church that finally becomes the church that turns the tide. Pray that every church that names Jesus as Lord, finally becomes the church that builds a community that brings people into such a transforming relationship with Jesus that EVERYTHING in their lives is defined by the Lord. Pray for a church that shepherds and stewards the people God gives them. Pray for a church that finally understands how to bless and be the Body that Paul described in the New Testament.
I don’t have the time to waste. Forty years ago in May, I heard this call, and because I valued people liking me more than following, because I valued being influential and popular more than leading, because I wanted to enjoy things in life more, I may have missed it. Not that God, in His glorious mercy, doesn’t redeem every part of our broken past, our misspent youth, and our developmental histories; no He will use every idle second for what’s ahead. But I am not Moses and I don’t have another forty years, unless some medical breakthrough somehow lengthens life again. The Church doesn’t have time. Culture is slipping, Government is slipping, Education is slipping, the Family is slipping, and we must change. We can not make decisions based on whether we will have jobs, or whether we will be provided for, or whether we will get the optimal location for our next venture. Or whether we will be remembered well in History. The Lord can provide whatever is needed….
It doesn’t mean becoming some sort of angry, always right, purist, who doesn’t want to understand how to interface to those who don’t yet get it. Instead, we need to pray for wisdom on how to effectively reach AND transform. Oh Lord, bring us all too our knees in humility and brokenness, only crying out to you for more of your Spirit, for more of the Father’s heart and Love, and for all of us to come under the leadership and Lordship of Jesus!
Lord, have your way!
Norm
P.S.:
Don’t give your strength to women… A title I wouldn’t have googled, but the message is a clarion call regarding men. Is this what happened to us the past 45 years???
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April 6th blog post?
About to go out. Had a long meeting this evening after a long afternoon away from my computer.
“I could have got more” Amen Norm. 🎯.
I hear your hope because of who we serve. Our God is a covenant keeping God who does not waver or forget. While you and I are just waking up to what might have been, HE has already redeemed our past. Now, in this moment because it is all I have, I pray for both of us that we will be in step with Him and obedient to His instruction in our next moments – in our spheres of influence and authority. That in our submission, He will be glorified and His Kingdom -His FAMILY – will increase.
He’s gonna do it with or without us. I want to be “in the game”, “on the field” not on the bench or in the stands. He keeps bringing me back to the end of Joshua where Caleb comes to collect his inheritance. I cannot boast that I am as physically strong as I was when I first stepped foot in Promised Land. But my spirit, mind and heart are stronger. We are eager and ready to go, Lord. Thank you for preparing us for such a time as this. Lead. We will follow.
Well said Nancy,
We look forward, not with hope about how well we have learned in the past, or in leaning on the strength of our ability to follow, but knowing that the redemptive nature of the Lord we serve has the power to make things new. We mustn’t retreat into empty intellectualism coupled with faith in some future outpouring however. If the Lord leads us to something, and to speak truth, we are still to follow, even in the speaking. I’m increasingly aware that we are at a crossroads in The Church, that will eventually divide some and empower others. The divide need not be seen in the classical sense, as division or dissension. In this case, it will be well-meaning and good-intentioned people who decide that the church has to accommodate culture in order to continue to influence what it can, and in doing so, continue to give up lines in the sand over and over and over as culture descends into whatever the end of this choosing is going to. Then, there will be another Church, that learns wisely to speak the truth in love, full of grace, and will be empowered to transform lives. The former church may seem successful for a time in the near future, but its power will be lost. Lives will be touched and inspired, but not transformed.
It will be then that the divide will be more evident. But it could be too late to bridge that divide by then.
I pray that we would remain faithful to Him, and walk in the fullness of the Trinity. With the Love of the Father, the Lordship of Jesus, and the Power and Fruit of the Spirit.
Thanks again.
Norm